How could you cope with the ongoing knowledge that you're going to have to have one of your children put to death in order to save the other? The doctors, on the other hand, were just enough detached from the situation that they could recognize Islaam's full humanity. I think it's likely that they didn't name her so that they could cope.
They knew from the get-go that the second baby had no chance, and that Manar could only live if the second child died. I think that the parents had to develop tunnel vision to cope at all. The doctors were quite compassionate in their treatment of this triplet who was destined to die ever since her existence became known, but she was a person, just one with a terrible, fatal birth defect :-( I think it was sad that her own family chose not to name her for those 10 months - she was only assigned a name before her burial. I just saw this show (in Australia) and although I love Oprah and have never found her to be tactless so far, I was upset by her constant referral to Islaam as "the parasitic head". To her discredit, though, Oprah kept referring to Islaam as "the second head" and "the parasitic head." Earth to Oprah: she only lived nine months in the womb and ten months outside it, but she was still a child, not a "head." The surgical team sought a religious consultation before proceeding because they were fully aware of the moral implications of surgery that would end Islaam's life. Just one of them with birth defects that made survival impossible. The entire medical team spoke of the two children. What Oprah's web site fails to report are the words that moved me to tears of gratitude: One of the twins' doctors spoke of how little Islaam was a human being, afforded dignity to the end, given anesthesia just like her sister. It was a rare case in which both conjoined twins will die unless they are separated in surgery that will kill one of them. So, despite the way the mainstream news covered this story, it wasn't a case of one baby having an unsightly and dangerous growth removed. And she was having blood supplied from Manar's heart." She was exchanging gases through Manar's lungs. "She was surviving on the heart and lungs of Manar. "Islaam didn't have a heart to survive on," Dr. Keeping Manar alive was a daily struggle.
Because Islaam was so dependent on Manar's body for survival, Manar suffered severe heart failure six times in the first few months of her life. Manar and Islaam had two different brains but shared a common blood vessel that fed off of Manar's vital organs. Manar had a twin who for some reason had never developed enough of a body to survive on her own. And the doctors confirmed what I suspected: This was not a "2-headed baby". Well, little Manar, her mother, and her team of doctors were on Oprah today. Was this a growth, or a second person living a parasitic existance? Should the ethics of killing the parasitic twin even enter into the equation? I blogged over at RealChoice about Manar Maged, an Egyptian baby who had "second head" removed.
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